
At first, Chris felt fine scamming the woman into handing over money.
The Nigerian man in his 20s told the听Herald听he used the 61-year-old鈥檚 financial gifts to live a lavish lifestyle.
New Zealanders have lost millions to romance scammers, and the Christmas holidays are high season for catfishing.
Chris, 25, used tactics that can be deployed on people of any nationality.
听鈥淪he gave me a lot of money, she gave me about US$21,000 [$33,000]. At first I felt so comfortable getting the money... because she was rich.鈥
Chris was a catfish, using a fake profile of an attractive person he thought likely to trick a victim.
鈥淚 just went on Instagram. I looked for a cute picture of a good-looking military guy. I set up a fake profile. I went on Facebook.鈥
He then found the older Australian woman online, and made contact.
During the scam, he never showed his real face.
鈥淚 only did voice calls. I talked to her on calls and she was able to fall for me because I seemed real to her.鈥
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Chris said he used his skill with accents to pretend to be American. And it only took four days before the catfish got money from his target.
鈥淪he buys gift cards, she uses Bitcoin, she sent Bitcoin.鈥
Apart from the $33,000, the duped woman sent Chris gifts worth an additional $24,000.
But the young scammer soon learned more about his target, and increasingly felt disgusted at his own behaviour.
鈥淪he was depressed, she was sick,鈥 Chris said from his home in Nigeria.
鈥淚 [was] beginning to feel inhuman. Would I allow someone to do this to my own mother?鈥
He said his conscience kicked in, and the guilt was overwhelming. Chris decided to confess and for the first time videocalled the woman.
He told her: 鈥淭his is me. This is me, Chris. I鈥檓 sorry for what I鈥檝e done to you.鈥
Chris said he was prepared for a bad reaction, and the woman cried. But to his surprise, she then appreciated his confession.
He offered to work harder on legitimate income sources and pay the money back.
Instead of seeking vengeance, the woman offered to provide moral support for Chris鈥 new life educating other people about catfishing and romance scams.
鈥淚t鈥檚 like she adopted me.鈥
Chris now works with Social Catfish, a company dedicated to preventing online scams through听听迟别肠丑苍辞濒辞驳测.
Social Catfish said the holidays were peak season for scammers who preyed on lonely widows and singles.
In the third quarter of this year, 65 romance scam incidents were reported to Government cybersecurity agency Cert NZ.
鈥淭he same scams work across the globe as the criminals take advantage of lonely people,鈥 Cert NZ鈥檚 Jordan Heersping said.
鈥淚t鈥檚 a sad fact that people need to be vigilant and cautious of those who approach them on social media and dating apps,鈥 Heersping added.
鈥淭he scammers know how to manipulate people and the losses, both financial and emotional, can be devastating.鈥
One cohort of catfish victims, people aged 45 to 54, have reported losses of almost $2 million since January 2021.
Scams and fraud were the second-most common type of incident reported to Cert NZ, after phishing and credential harvesting.
Reformed scammer鈥檚 advice
鈥淢ost of them who fall into traps are lonely,鈥 Chris added.
He said anyone interacting with a person met online should demand video calls and other forms of verification before getting romantically entangled.
But even that was not always enough to avoid getting fleeced.
鈥淚 have one piece of strict advice: Stop looking for partners on social media,鈥 Chris said.
鈥淔ind your peace with someone you can see. Don鈥檛 fall in love with someone who lives miles away.鈥
Chris was now living without the loot he got from catfish scamming.
鈥淚 used to have a lot of money. I used to live a flamboyant lifestyle.鈥
And although he confessed to the older woman, there was one group of people who still did not know about his secret.
鈥淣one of my family, my parents, my siblings knew I was internet scamming. African parents are strict, so strict. If I told my Dad I was into internet scams, he鈥檚 probably going to disown me.鈥
Leaked catfish manual
Social Catfish acquired a scammers鈥 bible. The 39-page manual tells aspiring scammers how to make western women 鈥渇all in love鈥 through online chat.
It urges scammers to aim for women who will 鈥渇all in love with you ASAP without much stress鈥 and adds: 鈥淕o for those over 40. They are working hence they have the money you need. Also, being single at 40, they are eager for love.鈥
The catfish author calls targets 鈥渃lients鈥 and describes the importance of research.
鈥淚 have a list of all my clients, and beside their name, I write information about them. Things like their pet, nicknames, children, birthday, things I see on their bio or they have told me,鈥 the guide adds.
鈥淭o message her for the first time, you want to go gentle and different. Do not send a hi... There are many people that have sent her 鈥榟i鈥 before.鈥
It then has a long list of pick-up lines including: 鈥淒id you get your licence suspended for driving so many guys crazy?鈥 and: 鈥淭o know me is to love me. Are you ready to get to know me?鈥
If a target takes the bait, the manual gives tips around how to contrive conversation and pay compliments.
It adds: 鈥淭ell her about yourself but keep it short. Tell her about your hobbies. It is best if you say a hobby that she also likes. That will keep the conversation going and make her like you more.鈥
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